I’m curious.  Have you ever experienced conflict with another person?  Perhaps a spouse, child, co-worker, family member, friend, random stranger on the street…  A conflict that leads to hurtful words, out of control emotions, indignation and at times, periods of silence? Please assure me I’m not the only one!

I’ve been struggling with conflict recently – an internal conflict.  A war within myself.  Battling thoughts ping-ponging in my brain – struggling in self-control to ensure that thoughts do not become actions.

When we’ve witnessed nastiness rewarded and hissy fits that produce positive results, it is increasingly challenging to bridle our tongue and restrain negative behavior. Rationalizing reasons to spew my two cents over my situation continue to play over and over in my mind.  Every emotion begs for release.

At one time, I would not have entertained this ping-pong ball battle.  I would have slammed that little white ball off the table the moment it was in sight, with nothing held back.

But what did this behavior accomplish?  I may have felt better for a moment – until the regret moved in and got comfy. Or I replayed the scene relentlessly in my head analyzing how I should have said something differently or with more OOMPH!

Honestly  though – I just looked foolish. I’m sure most of the time people walked away shaking their head questioning my sanity.  “What is wrong with her?” must have been thrown around a time or two.

And it was the perfect question.  Because there was definitely something wrong with me.  James 4:1 says, “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?” Notice this does not say – Did someone offend you?  Did someone hurt your feelings?

When facing conflict, instead of throwing a temper tantrum and allowing all the nastiness to seep out, what if we took the time to analyze what is going on inside of us?  What worldly desires are behind your thoughts?

Better yet, what if we went to God in prayer and submitted our emotions to Him?  What if we ask Him to remove selfish desires and worldly wisdom and replace it with His desires for us and His wisdom?

He is a big God.  He can handle our emotions and disappointments.

And maybe we would experience fewer conflicts.

Consider

• Describe in your own words the difference in judging between Matthew 7: 15-20 and Matthew 7: 1-5. What about James 4: 11-12?
• Read Luke 18: 1-8
  • What does this parable teach you about persistence?
  • What area(s) of your life need persistence?

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• Write our Hebrew 10: 22-25 from The Message. What comparisons do you see with James 4:8?

Feeling ambitious?

• Read Psalm 32 and Psalm 51.
  • Create 3 lists:
    • David’s actions
    • God’s actions
    • David’s advice
  • What, from these lists, speaks to your heart?
• Read Numbers 12
  • How do Miriam’s words and judgements impact her and those around her?
  • Do you recall a time in your life when your words and/or judgments made an impact?